so i am back in vancouver and back to my blog after a great trip home...saw all my friends and accomplished what i had been conceptualizing for a long time now...it was such a great feeling do that after just weeks of thinking...our thoughts are only thoughts until they are put into action, put into reality and allowed to grow and flourish...even if those thoughts are spoken, but the words are left to just mix with the molecules of the air and drift away, they mean nothing...i am focused now on taking those thoughts and using them as motivation to actually have my goals and dreams come true...that my friends is moving forward, being a better person and that is what i need and want to get back too...because that is what i missed the most...the inspiration to be a better person...i think i learned a lot about faith this weekend...being so far away in vancouver, it is hard to always see stuff back home, but that is what faith is all about, believing in something you can't see...i have always admired people with great faith and never quite understood it...and by no means am i am zen master after only a few days, but i know that i posses faith and it is growing inside me...my hope is the water and my belief in myself is the food that will fire the groth of this faith...somebody close to me this weekend told me that life isn't hard, you just do it...if it is part of life and the right thing to do then you just do it...i mean obviously sometimes it is going to be a struggle along the way, but never hard...and i really related to that because some of the big things that i was going home to do this weekend might have been view as really hard...but in my heart and my soul i knew it was the right thing to do so it was so hard after all...thank you masked wise one, i have much to learna and it excites me that i can learn from you.
so it was tough to leave, after having such a great time and feeling like that was my home again after only a few days it made me pretty sad...but to take the positive i know i have formed some relationships that are going to be with me forever and that is a really exciting feeling...knowing that those people are going to be by your side through the darkess of times and through the best of times...it is completly comforting, it actually makes me feel much safer in my own life...if i have learned anything from vancouver is that you can't do it alone and you can't run away from you life because it always catches up with you...and why i wanted to run away i am not sure, but the point is i have turned around and i am running back...i am running with shoes of greatness, painting the path as i travel...there will be no looking back after this point and think i made negative decisions or i wasn't confronting life...i will look back upon this path and it will glow, it will be the light that guides me along all new and unmarked parts of the path...i have a newly defined shining star...and every now and then when i am down and i think i will never get up it will wink...it will let me know i am never alone and i hope, i know that will give me the strength to carry on...it will give me the strength to be the man i want to be...it will give me the strength to live.
m.
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